Resisting Systemic Injustice Honors Nex’s Memory
Content Warning: This article deals with a lot of heavy topics including suicide, murder, assault, abuse, bullying, neglect; as well as references to genocide and forced assimilation. Reader discretion is advised.
If you or someone you know is contemplating thoughts of suicide, please call or text your local hotline. If there is immediate danger, please connect immediately with emergency personnel.
Introduction
The United States has an issue with a lot of isms. That much is certain among many scholars and activists, and hotly contested by others. The legacy of colonialism, the gender binary, and the impact on Indigenous Trans and Queer youth is a divisive issue. In order for us to understand how the death of Nex Benedict fits into this narrative, we have to do a lot unpacking. Certainly this is no small task.
Systemic forces that target Indigenous, Trans, Queer, and Non-Binary communities are all prevalent in our society. It's disappointing how our mourning is politicized and a person's boxes are considered more important than their humanity. It is necessary though to honor and recognize them, especially when the stigma of their labels led up to their death. After all, we are being systemically told every day whose lives and stories matter and which ones don't.
A general understanding of terminology is necessary to understand the concepts explored in this article.
Terms
Indigenous in this article is recognized as a broad word that can be applied to any person who identifies as belonging to a legally recognized ethnic group that has ancestral roots dating back before any colonizing power.
Native American in this article distinctly refers to those Native-identifying individuals whose ancestry can be traced back to continental North America. However, due to my own knowledge and experience collaborating with those in these spaces, I have come to grasp the title as also being applied to those living in Central and South America too.
Both Colonization and Imperialism in this article refer to the process of empire and conquest that was used to seize land from Indigenous peoples and to force them away from their homelands; alongside the psychological and spiritual warfare that took place.
Eurocentrism refers to an ideological framework that puts Europeans at the heart of human history and oftentimes ignores the historical contributions of others. This way of thinking has been challenged by critics, scholars, and activists who see the framework as one of many philosophical approaches that maligns the contributions and legacies of people outside of Europe.
Paternalism refers to the the policy or practice created by people in positions of authority that restrict the freedom and responsibilities of those they deem subordinate. This was often viewed as being in the subordinates' supposed best interests.
Throughout, I draw distinct differentiations between Non-Binary and other identities that fall within the LGBTQIA+ community.
Non-Binary serves as a distinct category of gender identity whereas Queer encompasses multiple different identities that include Non-Binary, but others too. This is in honor of the shared history of the LGBTQIA+ acronym, but also acknowledging the differences in experiences that are shaping the lives of people across the board.
Finally, Cis (short for cisgender) is used to refer to those who identify with the gender identity that they have been assigned at birth. People in this category can be heterosexual, gay, lesbian, or bisexual. It should be noted that this identity has no reference to your sexual preferences.
I welcome feedback regarding how to handle this topic with even greater sensitivity. Out of respect to raising awareness to different concepts of gender among the Choctaw and other Indigenous groups, I have elected to reference their traditional words honoring the existence of different gender identities. Also, I use Two-Spirit sometimes throughout this article, but it's important to remember that this is an umbrella term meant to galvanize political action behind the advancement of Indigenous LGBTQIA+ and is not a specific label. As the Transgender Law Center acknowledges, "While we say trans and Two-Spirit as umbrella terms for gender variance, we acknowledge that true representation of specific nations and tribes requires further attention paid to the language and beliefs of each."
Who Was Nex Benedict?
Before I get in the particulars about what makes Nex Benedict's death connected to a legacy of systemic injustice, we must first know who Nex was as a human.
Nex answered to he/him and they/them pronouns (in this article, I will refer to him/them as he/him and they/them to avoid misgendering, but also acknowledge some sources do say that he preferred he/him pronouns). He was a child like any other. They were born born in El Paso, Texas and was raised in Owasso, Oklahoma by their grandmother/adopted mother, Sue Benedict. Though Nex was never registered, his mother was an affiliated member of the Choctaw Nation.
Nex was fond of nature, and loved to read and draw. He was also an avid gamer, frequently playing Minecraft and other games. They were beloved by his family and his friends. His nickname was "Roach" or "Roachie." He was also referred to as a "fiery" kid. He had friends and people who loved him. They made art and created good energy around them. He would sometimes get in trouble for talking too much in English class. He also dated.
His partner, Spencer remembered that it was Nex who supported him coming out to his family as gay. Spencer mentioned that his partner's energy was contagious. Oftentimes, Nex would be the brightest kid in the room.
According to a report released by the Owasso coroner, Nex died with lethal amounts of two drugs in his system. This death by overdose occurred after the teenager sustained extensive injuries from an altercation that happened at their high school between them and three cis-girls. Before this confrontation, Nex was bullied for months leading up to the incident. Much of the abuse targeted the way he dressed and presented themself.
All of this transpired in a time when recent policy and legislation was passed in Oklahoma regarding bathrooms. According to the 2nd session of the 58th Legislature, "SB615 requires public schools to designate every multiple occupancy restroom and changing area as for the exclusive use of the male sex or the exclusive use of the female sex." By reiterating a strict definition of gender and relegating itself to a two-sex paradigm, the legislation seeks to uphold narrow definitions of sex, gender, and expression. This in turn has led to the bullying of Indigenous queer/non-binary youth and their cis peers.
Nex Benedict may have died from an overdose, but the bullying that he suffered while they were in school certainly did not help matters. A 2011-2021 Youth Risk Behavior Report found heartbreaking but insightful research. Trans and Queer people are more likely to experience violence in their homes and in their schools than their cisgender and heterosexual peers. They were also more likely to be harassed, and abuse illicit drugs.
Sex, gender, and their expression have never been the same despite arguments to the contrary. The concepts of what gender means and how they should be embodied have changed over the course of human history. Evidence suggests that the gender binary, as suggested by today's narrative, was first conceptualized and imposed during the Enlightenment.
What does Nex's death have to do with the greater implications of colonial violence and gender violence in the United States? What does a small-town kid's death, tragic as it was, have to do with the greater legacy of disenfranchisement and erasure of Indigenous people across the United States? How does acknowledging the traditional life-ways of Indigenous people help us expand the concept of gender?
To answer this, we need to develop a grasp of how colonialism, empire, conquest, the gender binary, and gender expansive identities are all intricately linked.
Linked: How Imperialism, Colonialism, and the Gender Binary Work Together
According to Sex and Love Coach, Suzanna Weiss, "Up until [the Enlightenment], popular thinkers thought more along the lines of a one-sex model, where male and female bodies were homologous."
At the time, the two-sex model actually shifted the traditional paradigm of understanding sex. Before the binary, the concept of sex and gender were understood as a one sex paradigm. In many Western societies where sex was being studied, women were viewed as "incomplete men." This was the mainstream idea amongst scholars studying medicine in Europe for generations. While the gender binary itself changed the understanding of sex, it was still extremely limited in scope. It was also used as a political tool to uphold ideas and values of what men and women weren't capable of or were culturally expected to do.
Scholars conducting research on sex, gender, and expression have challenged the notions of the gender binary, and have marked it as a byproduct of imperialism, colonialism, White supremacy and patriarchy. This is largely due to the fact that cultures across the globe— including in North, Central and South America— all had differing ideas about "third" or even multiple genders.
Among the Choctaw, their concepts outside of the male-female binary included a male-assigned woman and a feminine-assigned man. Those who were male-assigned were known as hatukiklanna while female-assigned were known as hatukholba. Nex personally saw himself as someone who was neither entirely masculine or feminine, but somewhere in the middle. In the traditional Choctaw sense, one could argue that if Nex could have fallen into one of the aforementioned categories.
I am not arguing that these traditional Choctaw terms were how Nex personally identified. Nor suggesting we impose any of these labels on him. This is a synopsis of what traditional Choctaw belief about gender maintains. This was before the arrival of Europeans to the continent and before the forced removal and subsequent genocide of the population and the forced cultural assimilation that occurred to the survivors.
Each Native American tribe has its own unique history with the European powers that first settled their lands and later built their own relationship with the United States government. All of them, regardless with how proceedings first started, were subjugated to intense violence and systemic hardships. This included the residential school system, which sought to "civilize" Indigenous people and forcefully assimilate them into Western society.
When Europeans first started coming to the continental United States, many were met with a world they never knew existed. They looked at this from a Eurocentric worldview, believing wholeheartedly that God created the world for their own usage. This was doctrine that was solidified in many Catholic and later Protestant worldviews about God, Christianity, environment, and the relations between Western Europeans and those with whom they made contact. Throughout the process, entire systems were put in place that dismissed the humanity of Indigenous people.
Native Americans were vilified for their appearance, customs, language, and traditions. This demonization targeted Native understandings of interconnectedness. It vilified the belief that humans were a part of nature rather than separate from it. Other ideas that were scrutinized included the widespread cultural acceptance of those who did not display one particular gender category or expression. In fact, these people were not only tolerated but had major roles to play in the community. These individuals joined war parties, healed community members, and as Elders they provided spiritual insights to their communities and acted as doorways to the Spirit World.
The vilification and the murders of Indigenous Trans and Queer people stems from a colonial system which seeks to eliminate the original populace of this land. This started early in colonial history. When European settlers began their campaigns against the Indigenous people, their first victims were often what we would today refer to as Two-Spirit, Queer, and/or Trans. Historical records mention that these people were often rallied up by Europeans and fed to their hungry dogs.
Gregory Smithers, a historian and scholar on Two-Spirit and Queer Indigenous identities, said, "...[T]he genocidal violence that targeted Two-Spirit people from the early 1500s was no accident. Europeans recognized that Two-Spirit people played important roles as trusted elders in their respective communities, served as medicine people, educators and storytellers, and took on myriad other roles. In other words, Two-Spirit people were, and are today, knowledge keepers."
One of the ways that the U.S. government tried to eliminate the knowledge and wisdom of the community was by creating residential schools. These were created in conjunction with Catholic and Protestant missionaries, who sought to "enlighten" Indigenous people with more Eurocentric values. What resulted were some of the worst human rights violations to occur in human history. (These schools were not just a U.S. phenomenon. They existed across several nations and continents including in Canada, Australia, New Zealand, and elsewhere.)
Richard Henry Pratt, founder of the Carlisle Indian Industrial School in Pennsylvania, famously coined the phrase"Kill the Indian, Save the Man." In a now heavily disputed, published article in the National Conference of Charities and Correction, Pratt argued that contemporary efforts of his time shouldn't focus on killing Native Americans. Instead, the resources of the U.S. government should work to eliminate Indigenous life-ways and practices. Essentially, Pratt argued that the best way to handle the "Native issue" was to "civilize" them in the ways of Europeans. The fallacy of his argument demonstrated heavy Eurocentrism and paternalism.
The highway to hell is paved with good intentions. Pratt truly thought that he was doing Native Americans a favor by arguing they didn't need to be starved, beaten, or killed. Instead, they should learn the "White man's ways" and become a part of American society. It wasn't long afterward that legislation was passed by Congress that founded over 400 residential schools in the United States. These schools set out with their mission in mind, to bring Indigenous children in to be "modernized" by White American standards.
Within the halls of these schools, Native youth were discouraged and severely punished for speaking their languages and customs. Those viewed as "boys" had their hair cut and shaved. Children were often stolen away from their families. Many were prevented from going back to visit family, even in strenuous situations. When children did return home to visit, they were incapable of communicating with many of relatives since they didn't speak the same language. Many also wrestled with the internal struggles of shame and guilt they sustained from enduring violence inside the residential school system. This was especially evident for those who were members of the LGBTQIA+ community, who endured intense and harsh punishments from these institutions.
Let me clarify, it was not just Indigenous Trans and Queer youth who were subjected to this violence and this torment. However, to get to the heart of what happened to Indigenous Trans and Queer youth in the U.S., we need to look at the intersecting layers of oppression. Since Europeans and then United States/Canadian residents saw Native children within a binary code, the children were treated as such. It led to widespread physical, sexual, mental, emotional, and spiritual abuse for many of those who were living there.
Indigenous children of all genders suffered under the hawkish, surveillance-like conditions. Many tried to run away from the schools only to be recaptured and sent back. Some were even killed during the abuse, or died from their wounds thereafter. Diseases spread due to malnourishment and lack of proper medical care from the staff hired to care for them. Others, unable and unwilling to bear the abuse, died by suicide.
Many of these deaths went unreported and many families never heard news about their child's death until long after. In Canada alone, thousands of unmarked graves have been found. From the 1870s until 1996, over 150,000 Indigenous children were sent to the residential schools. These children were between the ages of 4 and 16. It is estimated that more than 6,000 children died while at the Canadian residential schools. Just like in the U.S., the residential schools tried to "civilize" the Indigenous people. One of the ways they tried to do this was by forcing Indigenous Trans and Queer youth to equate their identity with their biological sex.
In the United States, the numbers are no less striking but definitely not complete. Years before Canada, the United States founded residential schools to eliminate the Indigenous identities within its borders. These schools were started in 1819 and went on until 1985, when the last residential boarding school in Alaska was closed. (It was reopened later that same year as a public boarding school.) In 2022, the first count of children who died while in attendance in the U.S. residential school systems was conducted. These figures also took into consideration the deaths of Alaskan Natives and Native Hawaiians, who themselves are referred to as their own categories even though they are all Indigenous people. Initial findings report that there were at least 500 children either killed or who died while they were attending the school system. The report mentions,"Based on the Federal Indian Boarding School Initiative investigation’s initial analysis, approximately 19 Federal Indian boarding schools accounted for over 500 American Indian, Alaska Native, and Native Hawaiian child deaths."
As of that May 2022 report, only 19 Federal Residential schools were accounted for, and of those 19... 500 deaths were confirmed. The numbers themselves are going to increase, as each of the 408 residential schools (389 remaining) are investigated. As the toll mounts, the United States will have a long history of abuse and genocide to contend with...if it chooses not to hide or shun away its strides towards reconciliation.
Other Attempts
The above-mentioned were unfortunately not the last chapter in the U.S.' attempt to erase the Indigenous people . Several other initiatives took place during the 20th century, including the forced sterilization of 3,406 Native women. These people underwent medical procedures where they were drugged against their will. When they woke, they found that doctors operated on them against their will. For cis-women and trans and non-binary people who also underwent the same treatment, this was an experience that haunted them for the rest of their lives.
Forced sterilizations were not the only other venture. Between 1959 and 1976 for instance, there was an estimated 12,881 Native American schoolchildren who were forcefully adopted out to non-Native families. While some of these families treated them with respect, many did not. In these new homes many were abused and shamed for what they were and encouraged to adopt the ways of the family they were living in.
Years later, oil and gas companies that sought to build pipelines went against tribal wishes and began excavating on reservations such as Standing Rock. This venture ignored the concerns for the community's water and environment at large. This sparked outrage and protest by members of the Standing Rock reservation and their allies. People traveled from across the world to protest such the venture and disrupt the process.
The Impacts of Empire
Indigenous Queer and Trans youth, just like their Cis peers, found themselves in many precarious situations where they were essentially shunned and demonized. Members of this community, out of survival, had to "pass" in society and that oftentimes meant going along with the binary regiment. Young Indigenous Queer and Trans youth were categorized into the gender box that they were prescribed as from birth. It was a violent act that was inflicted on generations of Native youth and adults who identified outside of the binary.
The violence against these youth unfolded in layers. Indigenous Queer, Trans and Cis children were sent to the boarding schools and endured abuse not only from several faculty members, but also from their own peers. Internalizing the abuse and neglect that they endured, many children often bullied each other too.
Even after the last of the residential schools were closed down, the legacy of the abuse and trauma to this day lives on inside those who endured it (and the effects of it are certainly going to be passed down genetically to the next generations). The Trevor Project noted that the structural challenges often contribute to mental health issues within Indigenous Queer and Trans youth. The organization collected data from scholars addressing mental health challenges within Indigenous Queer and Trans communities. According to Teresa Evans-Campbell et. al., "Former boarding school attendees reported higher rates of current illicit drug use and living with alcohol use disorder, and were significantly more likely to have attempted suicide and experienced suicidal thoughts in their lifetime compared to non-attendees."
There is no denying that Indigenous youth-- regardless of their gender identity-- all endured horrible treatment at the hands of colonialism. In order to fully reconcile the harm perpetuated by these systems however, we as a community and nation must acknowledge how this colonial legacy impacted all people irrespective of their gender identity.
How Bathroom Bills Continue the Legacy of Colonization
Many of the bathroom bills being discussed in various state legislators are set to target Trans and Queer youth, and among those groups are Indigenous Trans and Queer youth. These laws are written specifically to "protect" cis-women-- and technically speaking-- White cis-women. The bathroom bills and laws being debated and passed across the country are argued as necessary to protect the privacy of women in public restrooms. The fear of women being attacked while they are using the restroom is one that has been passed down for generation after generation. It is a fear that is not only recognized by the West but also carried across the globe.
Now make no mistake, cis-women being attacked in bathrooms is a genuine concern. Rarely do
they happen because of Trans and Queer people though. This is a truth acknowledged by several U.S. health agencies today, but it was also a truth recognized by Indigenous people before the arrival of European colonists. In the days before European contact, Two-Spirit folks often oversaw the rites of passage for girls and women including puberty rituals that honored when girls experienced their first period. They were commemorated and honored as individuals who understood the realms of both masculinity and femininity. As such, they were welcome in both masculine and feminine spaces. They rode out in war parties, participated in sewing and weaving, among others!
Sexual predators are a very real threat to cis-women. Across the nation, in North Carolina, a bathroom bill that seeks to relegate the use of public restrooms to biological sex were also put forth in HB2. In The Citizen, Reverend Mark Ward wrote an op-ed acknowledging that women have a right to be afraid of using public restrooms, but not because of Trans and Queer people. Rather, it is cis-men that cis-women should be weary of (and who they more frequently think of as inciting violence). The Reverend quoted a friend who said, "Women know bathrooms are unsafe; that’s why we go in teams."
The numbers do not lie. It is cis-men, not trans or non-binary people, who often are the ones responsible for attacks in women's restrooms. Several resources and studies have demonstrated that trans and non-binary people are more likely to be victims/survivors of assault in the bathroom. According to one study, 1 in 4 trans and non-binary students were attacked in the restroom because they were unable to use a gender-neutral restroom and were made to use the facility associated with their biological sex. These people and their lives are put at risk by following the very laws that are said to protect cis-women.
However, here is the reality of the situation. The legislation being debated in Oklahoma and across the United States do not protect cis-women or trans, non-binary, and queer students. In fact, current legislation seeks to pit cis-girls and women against their trans and queer peers. By driving a wedge between cis women, trans, and non-binary people; legislators and their donors who benefit from such legislation stand a greater chance at passing laws that will continue to disenfranchise these communities. This includes bans on tele-health for services that serve these groups, as well as providing biased counseling that would fail to explain the options available for people to make informed decisions about their health. Additionally, both cis-women and trans/non-binary/queer youth are at risk of being exposed to violence and backlash from parents who do not support their medical decisions...including if they decide to use birth control or contemplate an abortion.
Cis-White-women have often been used as means to justify discriminatory policies. The goal was to always regulate and control women's bodies by dictating who had first say over them. A woman's bodily autonomy was always something of question. For instance, early lawmakers in the Colonies drafted legislation to address how White women who had relations with Black and Brown men should be handled, and what to do with the legal status of their children. There are no shortages of this happening across history, and for different reasons too! During the years of segregation, miscegenation laws focused on "protecting" the “purity” of White women. White women were threatened with fines, imprisonment, and/or indentured servitude if they bore children of mixed ancestry. In the state of Maryland, the mixed child of a White woman was also sentenced to 30 years of indentured servitude to the Slaveholder who owned their father. Of course, the laws varied by state. Each state had its own laws and dictated stipulations of penalties. Many of these harsh stipulations never applied to White men who had sexual relations with Black women. These laws made it clear that Black women, and Brown women by extension, weren't viewed as human.
Similarly, cis-women are used as pawns to justify anti-trans/non-binary/queer identity. One proponent of this policy is Texas Senator and former Presidential candidate, Ted Cruz. The Texas politician is notoriously known for his views about trans people. In a statement, he said,"There is no greater evil than predators and if the law says that any man, if he chooses can enter a women's restroom, a little girl's restroom and stay there and he cannot be removed because he simply says at that moment he feels like a woman, you're opening the door for predators." In this argument, Cruz and other proponents of the bathroom bill conflate trans and queer identities with sexual predation. They argue that children and adults who dress like "girls” or “women" are doing so to prey on cis-women.
Rather than acknowledging the lived experiences of many different genders, it aims to categorize people as either men or women. It also seeks to paint broad strokes and to equate trans, non-binary, and queer people with predators. Therefore this ideology not only stigmatizes entire communities, but seeks to justify their mistreatment.
Over 200 organizations joined together in a coalition to address sexual assault, battery, and other forms of heinous activities and to decry the legislation that was passed to prevent trans and non-binary youth from using the bathroom that matches their preferred identity. They made the argument that the "Bathroom Predator Myth" was to stoke fear and to push forward legislation that will effectively stifle trans/queer rights and liberties. Chase Strangio of the ACLU Gay, Lesbian, and Transgender Project noted that states and municipalities that had protections for trans and queer persons did not see a rise in assault cases against cis women in restrooms. Nor was there any evidence to suggest that these laws could effectively be implemented without eroding the right to privacy.
In fact, cis-women found themselves the targets of harassment and bullying by other cis women within the bathroom. One White cis-woman in Las Vegas told the story of how another cis-woman screamed and yelled at her while using a public restroom, demanding that she reveal her gender. A Black cis-woman named Michelle Peacock was sitting out on her porch in Texas when she was murdered by her neighbor. When questioned by authorities, the man told them that he knew that she was "a male acting as a female." He later went on to add that he was happy that he did it.
Advocates point out that the discrimination against trans, non-binary, and queer folk is rooted in the same legacy of violence as the sexism and misogyny that targets cis-women. What we are also witnessing is that this "policing" of gender and gender expression is also a product of colonization and empire. This is done through shaming and bullying, and encouraging people of different genders to assimilate, to behave more in line with society's expectations of gender should be. Susan Rahman et. al. said, "When the script is not followed, we are reminded that we are not staying in our gendered lane, and are sanctioned in some type of way."
Though the victims of this violence span across different gender categories...the theme that remains the same is that these people had their humanity devalued. The fight that broke out between Nex and the cis-girls commenced when the cis-girls started bullying and berating Nex for how he dressed and chose to exhibit his gender identity. When Nex chose to defend himself by spraying water, he was beaten and suffered physical injuries that brought him to the hospital. It was this sort of bullying that led to Nex Benedict's death of suicide.
This was all wrought by the same kind of violence, partnered with the same institutional neglect, that chooses to overlook the concerns of Indigenous Trans and Queer youth (and other marginalized groups). From the legacy of colonization and its role of disrupting Indigenous life-ways and cultures to the attempted extermination and assimilation of Native youth into a White-dominant society. This attempt at "civilizing" the surviving members of Indigenous communities was anything but civil...and the affects are still felt today.
This same process shamed cis-men for having long hair, that belittled the leadership roles that cis-women held in their communities, and attempted to sever people from their connection to the earth via the vilification of their ceremonies and prayer. It also tried to eliminate entire ways of being that challenged binaries and the honor that these different ways of existing were bestowed.
Rallying in Solidarity: What You Can Do
It is one thing to honor Nex and to recognize the various forces that led up to his death. However, to take this information and to utilize it in such a way that can be strategically implemented to make a difference can be difficult. This is especially true for many of us who are still learning about the legacy of empire and conquest and its role in not only establishing but also reinforcing the gender binary. What do we do with this knowledge now that we have it?
I don't have all the answers. However, I do know where we can begin.
We start with honoring and recognizing individuals who are Indigenous, trans, non-binary, queer, etc. It also means looking to Native American leaders and Elders who have experience working with concerns about gender and how it plays out in our daily society. When we come together with our peers and recognize that our communities are linked in a shared legacy of disenfranchisement and dehumanization, we will make a difference. It means organizing with our leaders who see through the bathroom debate and who want to create spaces where everyone can not only be free to use the bathroom but also to live their lives without the fear of violence.
Learn from leaders and activists who have a legacy of reconciling with controversial and sensitive topics including gender recognition. Find communities that support and encourage growth and challenge your own assumptions about the world. Recognize that there are Indigenous people who are still here and who are bringing a lot of wisdom, nuance, and insight.
None of us are perfect when it comes to this topic. The concept of there being more than two genders is older than people give it credit for but we are all being socialized to believe otherwise. It is important that we challenge dominant narratives that undermine the value of trans, queer, and non-binary identities. It’s also important to acknowledge that Indigenous people are still here and to honor their history and contributions.
In the past, I was just as guilty of perpetuating negative ideas and stereotypes about this community as anyone. It was wrong and I own up to that. Yet I will not let the burden of guilt keep me from being a difference in the lives of those around me and a community that does not need my shame...but my voice and my dissent.
If there is somebody in your life-- Indigenous, trans, or otherwise-- who feels as though they are out-of-place in the world...be an example of community. Be willing to listen and be a neighbor, a friend, a pal, a confidante, an accomplice. Laugh with them, include them, coach them. Remind them that the journey may be difficult but it is worth living. Honor their lived experience and tell them that you are glad that they are here. Not only that, but thank them for making a difference in your life. Remember, these people are more than just their categories and labels.
They are artists, athletes, writers, musicians, scientists, scholars, inventors, warriors, healers; sons, daughters, children, siblings, neighbors, friends, and more!
Just like anyone else they have good days and bad days. Some are definitely more kinder than others. But they are all people just the same.
Whatever systemic means we have, we can use those to make a difference. Stand with them and advocate for Indigenous Queer and Trans youth (and others). Use the pronouns they want to be referred. Donate to causes that champion LGBTQIA+ causes and honor the intersecting layers of oppression. We can call our legislators and inform them that if they want our votes they must vote against any bathroom bills that seek to discriminate based on one's gender identity. We can also volunteer in our communities and participate in fundraisers that build community and advocacy around Indigenous movements, Queer, Trans, and Non-Binary individuals, and their intersections. We can also read books and consume content that supports members of these communities.
Anti-imperialism and anti-colonization are also rooted in the liberation from the gender binary. Let's take the time to be the difference. By breaking the chains of the gender binary, and the categories that imperialism and colonization put us in, we will get one step closer to being free and equal...and honored for who we are rather than what we are.
