One Year Later...
Back In January 2023, I was talking with an old friend and mentor of mine from Indiana, Pennsylvania. Anthony Frazier...founder of Fonzo Photography... is one of the kindest men you will ever meet. Not only that, but he is also intelligent and his eye for photography is astounding. He also is a great listener and confidante.
I remember telling Anthony the challenges I was facing with finding roles in the job market. I told him that I had been searching for a while...but no luck. Anthony listened the way he usually does. Over the phone, you can hear a pin drop on his end. He waits patiently for you to finish. He will interrupt when he wants something clarified but he also gives you the grace to get your point out there. His listening skills, his empathy, and his kindness are ones that I appreciate about him.
"Have you thought about starting a blog?"
"A blog? You think so?" I asked.
I was incredulous. I had started a social media page back several years ago that I gave up on because I was not seeing the results I needed. There, I focused on pairing my photography with poems. While it kept my poetic voice going...it certainly didn't feel like it was guiding me in the direction I wanted.
"Yeah! You're always talking about some important topics. You're a photographer. You're an artist. Instead of feeling sorry for yourself...why not write about them?"
It was an idea that years ago I had considered but had since filed away. A blog would be a lot of work and there was no guarantee of award. But I was looking at it and realized, nothing else I tried was working. I had the skills to design the blog from my credentials in media and from previous experience designing websites for my work. Why couldn't I start one? Except this time, I could focus on the things that I genuinely wanted to discuss.
That left the question though...what was I going to blog about?
Diversity and inclusion were definitely topics of my concern. However, at the time, I was noticing that there was something striking happening. Long before Palestine, the end of Affirmative Action, or other pivotal moments...I noticed that there was a backlash coming towards DEI. At the same time, I also recognized that there was something else happening...The DEI industry and social justice circles were being eaten from within. Core values such as critical thinking, social justice, authenticity, learning and growth, interconnectedness, and empathy were being lost in a lot of circles.
Just a couple weeks after, I attended a party for an acquaintance of mine. During my time there, one of the other guests at the party came up to me and started talking to me. As it usually does in a lot of circles here in Washington D.C., the question about my job came up.
"I am trying to get into DEI," I told him.
This man looked at me with disdain and all but snorted in disgust. He gleaned me over up and down. He asked, "How is that going for you?"
Better than you can possibly imagine, I thought to myself. I was off-put by the man's rudeness. Here he was, making judgments about me and the work that I was capable of doing...and was writing me off before he knew anything about my capabilities. In no uncertain terms, the man implied that because I was White that I was not supposed to be doing that work. He could also hear my accent.. and could tell that I was not from Washington D.C...but a small town in rural Pennsylvania. While I was certainly gay, it was as if that was not enough for the man. The truth of the matter was...this man did not know anything about me save for what he could visibly observe. Yet he was already making swift judgments about me and my competencies.
Though my encounter with this man was less than satisfying...it got me thinking about the themes of diversity, equity, and inclusion. It also propelled me me to further explore the questions I was already curious about. The life experiences I had...the good, the bad, and everything in-between were all lessons for me. They were also inspiring the topics that I wanted to blog about.
I wanted to explore the connections between the personal and the political. A quote that I heard by Charles F. Haanel goes, "The world without is a reflection of the world within."
I was haunted by the thoughts of diversity, equity, and inclusion and how they were being shaped by my world within and without. Just like everyone else, I have not gone through this life unscathed. Neither did those around me. Family members, friends, acquaintances, coworkers, managers, people I encountered online or saw in the news... they were all enduring hardships in their personal lives as well as their professions. Even when our circumstances and our backgrounds were different...the costs from them were tremendous and were oftentimes linked together. While not all these revelations led to positive or friendly relations between myself and others...they were still ones I kept to explore later.
Unbeknownst to that man, his judgment set me on the path towards what would become my blog. In February 2023, I had a thoughtful conversation with Amri B. Johnson-- an American Inclusion Strategist currently based in the Basel Metropolitan area. I have been an avid listener of Johnson's podcast and followed his work. The fact that I was able to secure an opportunity to sit down with him over video conference was a privilege. It was not my first time engaging with him...but this was going to be the first encounter where I was going in not only as a person to ask questions...but as one creator to another.
I recounted the story of what happened at the party that I attended. However, I did not come to Amri to vent or complain. It was time for me to take action and I knew it. There are lots of great podcasts and books out there about inclusion...but why are we still struggling with making progress? Where was the insight? And why were people so keen on perpetuating the same boxes that we were claiming to break? This was not just about someone saying that I was incapable of doing DEI work. My qualms were even bigger than that. The truth was...someone wrote me off before even knowing my journey.
Amri was troubled by this and empathized with me. "Inclusion is for everyone," he said.
Amri kindly and freely gave me some wisdom on how I could take the thoughts that were in my head and write them strategically in my blog. His advice was what I needed to start. He encouraged me to start reviewing literature that I was reading. He also reiterated that once I began, I must keep at it.
I took Amri's advice. The next day, I began looking for literature that fit within the categories of what I wanted to talk about. What I was about to do was no small task. I knew that I was going to be dealing with a lot of sensitive topics. Not only that, I recognized that I could face some potential backlash from some audiences. However, the pain of not having a space where I could share my thoughts...even if no one else was reading...was hurting me just as much. I needed to start making sense of the things that others viewed as isolated. I needed to share the connections I was making...even if others were not ready to hear.
The first book I decided to read and review was Carl Gustav Jung's Modern Man in Search of a Soul. Though the book in some cases is dated...the groundwork that Jung laid for the psychological study of philosophy and spirituality are still recognized in psychology, philosophy, religious studies, etc. I poured over the book, reading through the pages...acknowledging where things were out-of-date but cherishing the wisdom that could be still gleaned from this scholar's work.
But I was not ready yet. Even though I had chosen the subject of what would be my first review...I still needed to design the website and create an initial blog post. But there was one thing that I was struggling with...and that was how I was going to articulate my thoughts. Up until this point...these were all ideas that I had been keeping in my head. What I struggled with was putting them altogether in a way that made sense and also would resound with audiences.
It was a rainy day in Washington D.C. when I met up with my friend and fellow artist, Hannah Colen. Though she and I attended the same university, we never connected until we both moved to the area. Our mutual love for photography, art, music, food, and social justice made us great friends. However, Hannah's journey took her back north to Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Since she moved, we had not seen each other. Before this meeting, the last time we connected in person was at Christmas party I threw back in 2022. Much had changed since she and I last seen each other. Yet she and I are still artistic, kind, and determined to build better lives. I told her about what happened at the party. I also told her about how my previous efforts didn't seem to be working. Somehow, someway, I needed to try something else entirely.
I was excited and grateful that Hannah told me she was visiting Washington D.C., and wanted to reconnect. As a fellow artist and marketer with a concern for justice, I knew Hannah would be able to hear out what I was trying to do. Even up until the point where she and I met at the Smithsonian American Art Museum...I was figuring out how I was going to explain this blog to her. I wanted her to know that it was a website that I wanted to build. But I also wanted it to be so much more than that. After what I encountered at the party too, I knew it was going to garner me backlash.
I told Hannah about what was inspiring me to write this blog and to put it together. As she and I wandered the halls of artwork from many different corners of the country... she listened to me. Hannah was troubled by the story I relayed to her...and it reminded her of previous encounters she herself had in the past. She was also intrigued by the concepts I was exploring. They were topics that she herself was wrestling with as well, due to her own previous experience in professional and personal circles. She and I both knew that while the systemic issues were prevalent in our daily lives...there was something more going on. It was not just the social issues that were depleting us...but how we as individuals were treating ourselves and each other. The interpersonal issues were not separate from the political. The harm being inflicted on marginalized communities and the planet were similar in nature to those that were being inflicted on and around us in our intimate lives. Yet this was all being overlooked. Many people were not taking notice. They were not even aware of how their suffering was connected to the ailment of the whole. Worst still, some were using this for their own ends.
The work I wanted to explore was extensive...and even back then I didn't quite know how I was going to do it. Yet I was determined. I was inspired by scholars including Audre Lorde and bell hooks. These women were also champions of recognizing that our issues were intersectional and that we all have varying states of privilege and disenfranchisement. Yet I could see that there was still more to explore. Not only did I need to undergo a journey where I learned more about the topics impacting us on the systemic level...I needed to get down to psychological and individual level. I needed to also learn how we can effectively create substantive changes, even if the system was not going to hear us out.
Hannah was moved. "I want to read your blog when you publish it. Send it to me when you are done if you like, and I will give you feedback."
After she and I got done with our meeting, I returned to my apartment and immediately got to work. I developed the website using a builder. I mapped out what I wanted it to look like on paper before tailoring the design online. I spent time carefully considering the color scheme of the blog. I chose themes that would not distract the eye but certainly would complement the writing. All the while, I continued reading "Modern Man In Search of a Soul."
I drafted the first blog post...and decided that I would use a photograph that Hannah took of me when she visited D.C. In this photo, I was bundled from the cold and carrying an umbrella. This photograph caught my essence. I wanted this blog to be a genuine reflection of who I am as a person and artist. Not only that, but I wanted to use a photo that reflected a theme that I enjoy learning more about, and that is resilience.
After the website was developed I shared it with Hannah. She gave me wonderful feedback that was not only uplifting but also constructive. I took it and kept it in mind, and even explored some of the suggestions she made. They served my site for the better.
On April 4th, I published my blog and released the first post, Introducing: Insight. The initial announcement was met with positivity. Friends and network connections sent their likes, loves, and applause. I was grateful for the warm reception. However, it quickly became clear to me that the reception was good but the work ahead was going to be long and not always easy or immediately satisfying. Despite this, I went ahead and published what would be the first of several reviews. Review: Modern Man In Search of a Soul by Carl Gustav Jung became the first entry where I explored the themes I found relevant to the work that I wanted to do as a speaker, writer, and researcher.
There was still more work that needed to be done. However, I knew that I had the skills to share the insights I was coming across. Plus, I was driven by a mission.
One year later since I released my first post...and I see the strides I made. Though there is still much that I want to achieve for this blog, I am proud of what I accomplished. I have been reflecting on my previous work. Recent feedback from audiences have described it as "extensive" and "great." This past year, I founded Insight as a way to explore the thoughts, ideas, and connections that I was experiencing. I was encouraged to do this by exploring the content I was consuming. It also resulted in the production of original essays, op-eds, and even interviews with writers and artists.
This is only the beginning. There is more to discover, engage, and reflect on. Stories are out there and they need to be shared, witnessed, and told. Knowledge, wisdom, and insight are all awaiting us. Perhaps they themselves do not realize that they need or are worthy of being encountered. Now is as good a time as any though to engage with them.
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